So my mom left almost three week ago. At first I didn't want to write in my journal simply because I was feeling so sad and shitty. Really, its hard to explain how devastated I felt, and perhaps my emotions were enhanced by post-pregnancy hormones, but I was crying at the drop of a hat and feeling unbelievable nostalgic. I would walk by where she sat on the sofa, or find a hair clip she left behind, and my throat would tighten up and ACHE before tears even had an opportunity to appear.
I also missed her help - I had gotten used to handing Aviv over to her every morning at 6am, and going back to sleep until about 11am (my mom fed her a bottle of expressed breast milk around 9am). Emiro IS trying to help as much as possible, but really, there's no replacing mom :)
The first couple of days Emiro tried to distract me as much as possible (allowing me to watch my silly reality shows, taking a couple of trips to the mall for window shopping, inviting friends over for wine and dinner) and then slowly I got used to the new routine. We even ventured out to the movies - we saw Indiana Jones and the new Batman- and Aviv was in my sling the entire. She ate the first 15, slept most of the movie, and then ate again right towards the end. We felt so NORMAL going to see a movie again..... It was bizzare! I'm feeling much better now. Again, its those first days which suck sooooo much. So, I will try to be around more, and I have SO much updating to do! I think I will divide it into a bunch of "Aviv's firsts" posts :)
In the meantime, here are some funnies.....
"Milk high" ( 2 weeks old)
Maxi inspecting the competition
And then fighting for some attention as well
Combining Emiro's greatest loves -- Aviv, the remote control, and a nice hot cup of starbucks coffee...... ( 6 weeks)